Why try to teach an old dog new tricks? Why?

Like many other thousands, we decided to watch Xarabank last Friday. If nothing, we felt like helping Peppi reach the top spot in those surveys. Haha.

Adoption was Friday's topic. Or rather, the nitty-gritty of it. But you already know that, don't you? The ladies at the grocer's will have already filled you in by now.

In any case, we aren't about to discuss who should or shouldn't be allowed to adopt. In fact, it's something wholly different that we're on about today. Alas, since the Maltese hardly see the wood for the trees when it comes to bringing up solid and real arguments, this topic goes hand in hand with any other.

The Church. That's what we'll be talking about here. Unfortunately, many on this island have that very tedious proverbial bee in the bonnet. And hell if it annoys us.

Why, oh why, do so many have to bring up religion in every discussion? Let's leave aside those who do it unconsciously, who still deserve a good spanking. But the most horrible ones are those who do it to sound all mighty and patronising - they hector you, and there's no way you'll ever have a decent conversation with such people. Spanking won't do with the latter, so shove a good-sized carrot down their throat when you get the chance.

Yes, such people are pedantically infuriating. But we're not here to discuss them, either.

While watching Xarabank, one could easily notice that many Maltese believe the Church should move on; should revamp its views; should, should, should...

We are using what went on on this last Xarabank episode merely as an example, because in reality it is very indicative of the way many people seem to be discussing things these days.

Those who know us are well aware of the fact that, albeit Catholic, we don't really and truly practice much. We believe in God, we hasten to add, lest the rector decides to commence legal proceedings (you never know!). Yet, those being so preposterous are just as annoying as the zealous Christians. That's sheer nonsense. Yes, simply nonsensical.

We don't want to be mean, but a spade must always be called a spade.

How long has the Church been there? Yes, right. It's been there forever, so to speak. It has been holding onto the same beliefs since its conception. Some things have changed slightly, but that's pretty much it.

We disagree with many things the Church professes to be cast-iron facts, lest you think we're some brainwashed, wacky ones. However, we simply cannot expect to knock on the Pope's door and hand him a list of things to be changed, because hey, w e don't really fancy those bits.

No, you can't do that.

If that were possible, don't you think that there wouldn't be a need for religions at all? Those who believe, the real ones, not the fake pious ones, do so because they want to believe in something beyond their comprehension. Whether you like it or not is beside the point, really.

Much to our dismay, we always get the gibberish talk lately. This time it's because of Alison Bezzina raising the question about adoption. Some months ago it was because of the divorce issue. Coming up next will probably be abortion. We'll see.

No matter how many points some people will come up with, the Church cannot possibly revamp itself. If it does that, it will be doomed to collapse. No religion can - nor should - evolve just because we now want it easier. We are not bound to abide by its rules, after all. It was very easy for us to vote YES for divorce, for example - once you've a functioning brain then you'll know what's good and not, and you needn't wait for the Church to tell you what to do.

What these people should be doing is something else. They should insist that the Church has no say in things that pertain to the state. The Church must not be privy to certain delicate matters and must not stand in the way of policy-makers. Unfortunately, though, neither the state nor the people have the guts to put the Church in its place and let it know that when it comes to matter of legality and statute, it has no say.

It is much easier to jump on someone's bandwagon rather than saying what really should be said. And the Maltese are worse than parrots at times. "What Cetta says at the grocer's is what I'll say at the ironmonger's" is too much of a horrendous syndrome pervading these islands.

People desperately need to start thinking things through a little longer before uttering such nonsense, whilst being totally oblivious to the weight their statements carry.